Date: May 20th, 2010
I'd like to write a flamboyantly egotistical entry about how easy it is for me to meet people, kiss hands, shake babies, etc.. but that would be a lie. When I know what I'm going to say or I'm enthralled by what the other person is saying, I generally manage pretty well. When that's not the case, like most people, I struggle a bit more. I fear the awkwardness, wonder what kind of a first impression I'm making while I'm still making it, and let my mind wander to a safer place, inevitably losing my place in the conversation.
Because of that vaguely rational fear, I've generally avoided jobs that involve cold door knocking or cold calling people. See, in those cases, having a pitch is a double edged sword. Sure, I have something to say to start the conversation, but what if the person says something unexpected?
Me: Would you like to subscribe to People Magazine to help blind children today, sir?
Gentleman: It depends. Is People Magazine endorsed by Xenu?
Me: By who?
Gentleman: Be gone, vile temptress!
**true story**
And that's where the less rational part of the fear kicks in. As easy as it is to talk to people about my blog or my family or even just to listen to them talk, when it comes to business calls, I get worried. What if I don't know the answer to one of their questions? What if they lose confidence in the service we provide because I mess up and tell them something wrong? What if I forget to water the houseplants? Its deeply concerning.
On my first week on the job, my supervising attorney sent me off to make calls to clients about appointments, their current case status and other important information. That fear started creeping in and I tried to think back to the last time I called a business client. Never at Plum, seeing as cashiers didn't get phones. Not once at Cisco or Yahoo. The US Attorney never asked me to. Ok, no problem, what about volunteer positions? No... nope.... never.
Having realized that my work assignment could count for my thing of the day if I wanted it to, I decided to do it up right. I sat down for a few minutes, took some deep breaths and ran through the conversations in my head. I thought about a variety of reactions, from grateful for the help to rude as heck to a level of crazy as yet not understood by modern science. Then I decided to focus on fighting through my fear of awkward irrelevance.
At the end of the day, my calls weren't perfect, but my confidence was way up. I realized that I am a strong enough person to fight through fear when the situation calls for it. Maybe its not the same as locking up an abusive husband, but those clients needed information or a meeting time or an update on their cases and my ability to provide that for them hinged on my ability to, quite frankly, suck it the heck up.
So... I grew myself a spine and made the calls.
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