January 24: Compliment Day

Today was National Compliment Day.  I think the holidays where we're directed to reach out and do something nice are my new favorites.  I remember being told at a young age by my parents that if I'm ever happy with the job someone did for me (as a restaurant for example), I should make a point to leave a comment or say something to management because most of the time people only say nothing or complain.  This is a holiday somewhat in that spirit.

Before leaving work on Thursday night, I wrote on our communal message board that it was Compliment Day on Friday... and then proceeded to work from home.  Why?  Because of Houston's SNOWPOCALYPSE of ought-14.

Quelle horreur!

Since we were at home, we also reached out to people online and over various forms of technology.  

We posted a reminder for people to compliment one another on Facebook that was picked up by a couple good friends of mine and led to some lovely words being shared, which was great to witness.  I also got a couple nice comments from a coworker that made my day a lot better and I picked a couple coworkers to send things to.  Here's what I noticed - complimenting someone can be really hard.

That sounds seriously narcissistic, but that's not how I mean it.  STAY WITH ME HERE.  The compliment itself is easy - formulating the thought is harder.  For example, one of the coworkers I sent a note to I think very highly of, but were it not for the holiday I would NOT be able to explain why.  I just... think... erm... the person just makes me smile.  Like - bad mood to good mood kind of thing.  So, without a holiday where we were forced to think about the specific good things about other people, I might never had told her that she makes people happy to be around.

We complimented each other too, which was a lot easier.  I tried to think about why that was.  Obvs, Justin likes me somewhat and I think he's super neato - but we also both think highly of other people and have things we like about other people.  It occurred to us as we talked about it that compliments, unless they are on a basic and observable trait, are actually pretty intimate.  Even though it is positive, complimenting someone is expressing an opinion on some aspect of who they are or what they do.

I think that is part of what stops people from saying nice things about each other - there is a sense that it will seem condescending or be taken the wrong way.  What we learned today was - don't let that stop you.  I mean, don't get all boundary oversteppy or whatever, obvs.  But compliments rock.  Do them more.  That is all.