Date: June 5th, 2010
Sometimes you wake up, look out the window and realize that its going to be a beautiful day. I love mornings like that. I watched the sun stream in the window to my wall and slowly crawl toward my head as the sun rose over the trees. I decided to stay in bed and watch the sunspot crawl toward my face. Thirty minutes later I was enjoying the warm glow of sun on my cheeks and thinking about how lucky I am to have the things I have in this life.
I had planned on doing one of several highly interesting and amazing things on Saturday afternoon with Justin, but decided instead to go shopping. I know, I know, highly irresponsible, but we were planning on going to the lake in the evening to hang out with my parents so I figured, worst case scenario, I learn to drive a pontoon boat for my thing of the day. I have to admit, as I approach the halfway mark, a shift has begun to happen. My daily habits revolve around finding that new thing. Some of the polish has worn off this project, which isn't to say that I'm not loving it. I still adore it, but its more real than it was before. There was a little too much shine, as I look back.
In any case, we were out shopping on a sunny Ann Arbor afternoon when we stumbled past a young woman sitting on the sidewalk. She was playing music softly, with a little bit of a lilting tone. She was beautiful. I mean, strikingly, strangely, alluringly beautiful. Next to where she sat was a sign asking for money. It wasn't an obnoxious or obvious sign. I saw plenty of people walk right past and not even see it. But as we walked past, Justin and I both saw it and had the same thought. We walked into the nearest store, browsed for a while and subtly gathered what few small bills we had to give to her.
As we were leaving the store, I was struck with another idea. She was there, clearly tired and hungry, watching as people pretended their purses lacked change and their pockets were empty, just patiently hoping someone would notice. There was a point at which I would muse about what put her there. Drugs? Family trouble? Hard times? I've come to a point in my life where I don't care about what put someone in the situation they're in; just that they're there.
With that thought in mind, we walked across the street to Starbucks and bought her a bottle of water and a bagel. As with the few dollar bills we'd given her just moments earlier, we focused on being subtle and polite. We were both keenly aware of the fact that spectacle was not the purpose of the gesture. I set the bagel and water down next to her, smiled, nodded and walked with Justin back to his car. It was almost a block later that I realized I'd never done that before. I felt alternately proud of and disappointed in myself.
How did I go a quarter century without buying a meal for a stranger? It was definitely a "paint-by-number" moment for me. I've been having more and more serious moments of reflection as time has gone on. I'm deeply sorry to the people who started following this project for its comedic value. The past couple weeks have just been too, well, real, for that. Hopefully the silliness will resume. Perhaps I'm due for some more "out there" experiences to shine this project back up. In the meantime, the real impetus of this project is starting to sink in. That comment will make a lot more sense when you read Day 158.
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